Here's my preview of what to expect this fine Thursday evening:
- Comments from the public are interesting at every meeting, and fascinating. Some of the public's questions are really sharp in bringing up major issues facing the Borough (e.g. Whatever happened to the hotel?) However, there's usually one really dopey question each month that has me laughing harder than anything Family Guy can parody. Enjoy.
- Distribution of Media 5 Mile race proceeds - Ooh, Paydirt!!! Check out some of Borough Council's older meetings here, where there have been battles over where the money goes for the annual 5 mile race that seems to be a regular political squabble. Republicans claim money goes to sweetheart scholarships for Democrats' kids, while Democrats claim the statement has no backing, all without providing breakdowns of distributions - you know - cause they're a "Private Organization". How convenient. We should see some fireworks.
- Environmental Advisory Council - Brian "Out of my League" Hall. Yes, the position ripped away from Pete Alyanakian, the guy who created it, so Brian could bolster his re-election resume, always a meeting favorite of mine. Since the ouster, Brian's done nothing more than read a few general announcements that can be read on Town Talk or on Channel 10 during the day. Maybe we'll see Hall/Alyanakian battle - as there have been a few since the beginning of the year
- Fencing Along Third Street Bridge - my favorite useless bridge next to the swim club! This may spar a debate about what to do with said bridge. Want my opinion? Tear the thing down or let Upper Providence pay for repairs! We've lived without it for, what, nearly 10 years now? Why change anything?
- Traffic Ordinance Amendments - Ernie Derrickson. Looks like there's an ordinance to pass. I have no clue what's in it, and yes, I'm too lazy to pull it up for you (If someone has a copy, I'll post it and give you credit). In the past year, Jim Cunningham has fought for more crosswalks and a lower speed limit on State Street. While we now have more paint on our roads than I-95, the speed limit on State Street remains at 25 mph, which is a problem. Even if this ordinance pertains to another matter, I am sure we'll have some interesting discussion.
- Bid/Award - Maintenance Contracts - Ernie Derrickson. Hear me out, folks, it doesn't matter which party is presenting contracts of this type, YOU ARE GUARANTEED A DEBATE BECAUSE SOMEONE'S ALWAYS IN ANOTHER'S POCKET. I believe we'll see some finger-pointing and accusations here, whether or not they're real, who cares? Get your popcorn ready for this one.
- Road Improvements & Intersection Repairs - Ernie Derrickson. Poor Ernie! What did he do to get such a rough agenda this month? Don't worry, E. When the meeting's over, I'll slip down to the Iron Hill and buy you a pint, if the Oktoberfest is still on tap, I recommend it, it's delicious! Anyway, this could be an interesting public issue - e.g. "Why hasn't my road been paved?" It could also lead to some Speed Bump debates, and maybe a continuation of the State Street speed limit.
- Authorize Solicitor to Draft and Advertise an Amendment to Dogs and Animals in Public Places - Ernie Derrickson. Three words - CATS ON LEASHES. Could this get any more entertaining?
If I can find time, I'll try to do a summary of the meeting. Your comments and observations are welcome, hey, I may even steal your lines for a post on this blog! Email me at jokelanddotcom@yahoo.com (Yes, that's my real email address - long story) with your insights during the meeting!
-Steve
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